Been in my new hometown for a few days now. The transfer of all my medicaid and social security from Nebraska to Oklahoma seems to be going smoothly. Haven’t had any real hiccups yet. Been on the phone alot the last few days. I also want to go back to church again. I’ve found a renewed enthusiasm for God and religion in the last several months. I guess having a near death experience can do that to a person. I’ve found myself praying several times a day now. Mainly being thankful for my progress and praying my health problems can be solved. I haven’t been out and about since I moved here. Had a nice visit with my brother and two of his sons the other night. I’m excited about developing a deeper relationship with my brother and his family. My brother and I weren’t close as kids, but I think the fact we no longer live together has helped the relationship in adulthood. I also think me having health problems and him having a family and a career forced us both to grow up.
I’m also wanting to go back to church. Even at my worst, I never lost respect for God or the good work done by religious organizations in general. I may not have believed in divine intervention for a long time, but that was mainly a defense mechanism to explain to myself why God shouldn’t favor me over millions of other people even more deserving of good things. I guess justice is when we get what we deserve. Mercy is when we don’t get what we deserve. Grace, I guess, is when God gives us what we haven’t earned or deserved. It also helps that my life was saved by doctors and nurses at a Catholic hospital, even though I myself isn’t Catholic. I grew up in the Church of Christ. Some churches can be kind of strict about somethings, but one will get a good education in what the Bible does and doesn’t say after a few years of attending the CofC. Even at my worst, I never lost respect for God or the Bible. At least not enough to close that part of life off permanently.
I’m continuing to lose weight. I cook some of our meals as a family, granted I’m still trying to get the hang of a gas stove. I have memorized my parents’ address. I found a new pharmacy and a potential new bank. I’ve started the process of canceling my Nebraska Medicaid in favor of my Oklahoma Medicaid. Qualified for food stamp benefits. Also found out from a really helpful social security agent that, since I was diagnosed with schizophrenia at age 20, I might be able to requalify for social security disability payments based on my parents’ salary. Since my family was, more or less, upper middle class, I could be getting a substantial raise in my disability pension within the next few months.
I walk everywhere in my parents house. I still occasionally have issues with incontentience. To remedy this, I use pull up disposable briefs. While I am not proud of wearing adult diapers, it serves the purpose. Somedays I can go without issues. I certainly don’t have the problems I had previously. But if I continue to lose weight, the incontentience issues should resolve themselves.
Weight wise, I’m the lightest I’ve been since 2014. If I lose another 20 pounds, I’ll be lighter than I have been since 2010. I’m continuing to lose weight even outside of the nursing home. I was on a calorie restriction diet that helped me lose 90 pounds in seven months. My goal is to eventually get back to my old high school weight. Probably take a year or two, but I am making progress with every passing day. I’m not where I want to be just yet, but I am on the right track.
I’m still working on the process of setting up residency in Oklahoma. First have to transfer my social security disability and Medicaid over from Nebraska. That process is started. Once I establish residency, I’ll look into low income housing. I think I’ll qualify for section 8 housing, which will help me with my rent. It could take a few months to qualify. I’ve also decided to register to vote once my residency is established. I probably won’t join either political party as I feel both parties have valid points on various issues. I have both conservative and liberal friends, both of whom make valid arguments for their positions. It just breaks my heart to see congress fight among themselves so much. I guarantee that both China and Russia love seeing our politicians fight among themselves and not try to pass good legislation.
I’m also eventually thinking of finding a part time job. Either that or trying to make my writings as profitable as a part time job. Made some royalties from some of my ebooks I had published several years ago. I think there may be a market for my writings. I’ve also decided to republish my mental illness book, which was the original inspiration for this blog. I will find out if my promotions of my books bear fruit in a few months. The royalty payments are usually several months behind.
Overall things are getting easier with each passing day. I’m adapting to life in Oklahoma nicely. I’m getting things done. Maybe in a few months I can establish residency and qualify for my own place. Hopefully that’s part of the plan.