College Summer Road Trip in the Deep South

The summer I turned twenty, I decided I was tired of red dirt roads and wheat fields. Tired of calf roping on weekends and the same two cafés in town swapping out the pie flavors like it was big news. Tired of being known by everyone before I even opened my mouth. So when finals ended at my small college in rural Oklahoma, I loaded my old Honda Civic with a cooler full of Dr Pepper, a duffel bag of clothes, and a Rand McNally atlas that still smelled like my dad’s shop. I didn’t have a plan beyond “head south.” I figured if I got lost enough times, I might find something worth keeping.

The day I left, the morning heat had already started its slow chokehold on the plains. I rolled down the windows, let the wind slap me awake, and pointed the car toward Texas. The highway stretched out like a dare. I took it.

Four hours later, I crossed the bridge over the Sabine River into Louisiana. The air turned thicker, as if someone had soaked it in motor oil and humidity. By Shreveport, my shirt clung to me like a nervous kid. I wasn’t used to air that pressed back.

South of town, I stopped for gas at a truck stop where the sign read “Boudin & Biscuits.” I bought both. The biscuit was dry, the boudin was perfect, and the woman behind the counter called me “baby” without even looking up. It felt like a welcome.

My plan that day was to make it across Louisiana and into Mississippi by sundown, but the swamps had other ideas. The road dipped between cypress trees hung heavy with Spanish moss, the sky deepening into a purple bruise. I pulled off at a scenic overlook—though it wasn’t clear what was scenic about a stretch of murky water dotted with the occasional alligator—but I stood there anyway, listening to the chorus of insects warming up for their nighttime performance.

A pickup truck rolled in behind me, and two men climbed out—thick accents, sunburned skin, baseball caps with fishing brands. One of them nodded at me.

“You lost, cher?” he asked.

“Maybe,” I said. “Depends what counts as lost.”

They laughed like I had told a joke. One of them pulled a couple beers from their cooler and offered me one without ceremony. I took it. The swamp hummed around us, thick and alive.

We talked about fishing and storms and how Oklahoma wasn’t the same as Texas no matter how many tourists thought it was. They told me they were from down near Houma, Cajuns from generations back. They talked fast, half in English, half in a musical blend of French and something else entirely. I nodded when I could; mostly I listened.

“You gon’ melt out here,” the taller one said. “You stick around too long, the skeeters’ll make a meal outta you.”

“Probably already did,” I said.

He grinned. “Then you fit in just fine.”

I finished my beer, thanked them for the hospitality, and hit the road again as the last light died. The swamps breathed darkness. Somewhere far off, thunder grumbled like an old man shifting in a recliner.

By the time I crossed the Mississippi state line, the night was so heavy it felt like driving through ink. I rolled the dial on the radio, trying to find anything not static. A preacher’s voice burst in, loud and urgent: “AND THE FIRES OF JUDGMENT SHALL LICK AT THE HEELS OF THE WICKED!” I kept it on for a while, partly because it kept me awake and partly because it felt right for a lonely drive over the Delta’s flatlands.

I reached the Delta proper just past midnight and decided I needed to stop before I fell asleep at the wheel. The first sign I saw was for a place called Eddie Mae’s Juke Joint, a flickering neon sign on the side of a sagging building with a gravel lot and a porch crowded with people smoking. A hand-painted sign said: “Live Blues Tonight.” That was enough.

Inside, the air vibrated. A man on stage with a steel guitar was bending notes that sounded like the floor of the earth cracking open. His voice was a gravel road soaked in whiskey. People swayed, stomped, leaned over their beers like they were confessing sins to them.

I took a seat at the bar. The bartender was a woman in her fifties with hair piled high and gold hoops the size of bracelets. She poured me a cheap bourbon without being asked.

“You look like a boy who ain’t seen a real juke joint before,” she said.

“Am I that obvious?”

“Baby, you practically shining. Folks around here don’t walk in smiling unless they lost.”

“Is being lost a bad thing?”

She shrugged. “Depends why.”

The man on stage slid into a slow, aching melody, something raw enough to make my throat tighten. The bartender sighed.

“That there’s Clarence ‘Catfish’ Porter,” she said. “Been playing longer’n you been alive. Man’s fingers talk better than most folks’ mouths.”

I listened. She was right.

Two hours slipped by. Time didn’t work the same in that place. It stretched and curled like smoke. When Catfish finished, the crowd hollered, and he nodded like it was his birthright.

I left with the sound of his guitar still buzzing in my ribs.

At 2 a.m., hungry and bone tired, I found the only place open for miles: a Waffle House glowing bright as a UFO in the Mississippi dark. I parked beside two pickup trucks and a sedan with stickers for every local church.

Inside, the cook and waitress were arguing about whether the Elvis impersonator who came in on Sundays was actually good or just enthusiastic.

I took a seat at the bar. Two older women sat at the booth nearest me—both in floral dresses, both wearing church hats despite the hour. They had purses big enough to hide spellbooks in. They eyed me like they’d been expecting me.

“You traveling, sugar?” one of them asked.

“Yeah,” I said.

“Heading where?” the other asked.

“Not sure yet.”

They exchanged a knowing look.

The first leaned in. “Everybody who comes in here lost at this hour ends up exactly where they supposed to.”

I wasn’t sure if that was comforting.

They told me they were “Mojo Ladies,” which I assumed meant fortune tellers or something similar. They didn’t explain. They didn’t need to. One of them reached across the table, took my hand, and squeezed it.

“You carrying something heavy,” she said. “But you ain’t ready to set it down yet.”

“I didn’t say anything about—”

“You ain’t gotta. It’s in your eyes.”

The other nodded. “Whatever you looking for, baby, you gon’ find a piece of it in Georgia. Mark my words.”

The cook slid my waffle onto the counter. The Mojo Ladies sipped their black coffee like prophets in polyester. When they left, they pressed a peppermint into my hand like it was a talisman.

“This’ll keep the road kind,” one of them said.

I didn’t believe them. But I kept the peppermint.

I slept a few hours in my car outside the Waffle House, waking to the sunrise stretching over endless fields. Mississippi bled into Alabama, and suddenly I was driving past cotton fields that rolled out like white oceans. The plants rustled in the wind, soft and restless.

I pulled over and walked to the edge of a field. The cotton was thick, fluffy, deceptively gentle-looking. I’d read enough history books to feel a weight in my chest staring at it. The past wasn’t past here. It stuck to the air, to the ground, to the way the fields seemed too quiet.

I stood there a long time before driving on.

A few hours later, just outside Tuscaloosa, I stopped at a barbecue joint where a young trucker in a red Ole Miss cap sat next to me at the counter. He had a grin like he’d been born laughing.

“You ain’t from around here,” he said.

“Nope,” I said.

“Oklahoma? Arkansas? I’m guessing Oklahoma.”

I blinked. “How’d you—”

“You got that panhandle twang. I hear it all the time at the truck stops.”

We talked over pulled pork sandwiches. He told me he’d been driving long hauls since he turned nineteen, and that fall Saturdays belonged to one thing only.

“Ole Miss football,” he said. “That’s church, brother.”

I said something about how Oklahoma folks felt the same way about the Sooners, and he waved me off.

“Yeah, but y’all got actual expectations. We mostly got hope. Both’ll kill you, but hope’s slower.”

When we parted ways, he slapped my shoulder.

“You keep drivin’ till something feels right,” he said. “That’s what my daddy always told me.”

I wasn’t sure if it was good advice, but I wrote it down later anyway.

Georgia rose up with red clay shoulders and thick forests. By dusk I was deep in the rural stretches, following roads so empty I wondered if I was the last person alive. The radio crackled again with a preacher proclaiming the end times. I switched stations and found a conspiracy theorist rambling about UFOs above Atlanta and lizard people running Congress. I switched again and found another preacher, even louder. Mississippi stations traveled farther than they had any right to.

At one point, the sky lit up with silent lightning behind a cloud line. It looked like God taking photos of the earth.

I pulled into a clearing outside a small town whose name I never saw. A group of old men sat around a fire pit beside a weathered barn, laughing and passing around a mason jar. They waved me over like I was late.

“You look thirsty,” the oldest one said. His beard was pure white except for a streak of brown under his lip from tobacco.

“What’s in the jar?” I asked.

“Confidence,” another said.

It burned like the surface of the sun. I coughed so hard they laughed until they cried.

“You ain’t from anywhere near here,” the bearded one said.

“Oklahoma,” I said.

“That far enough.”

We talked about fishing, baseball, the way the South had changed and not changed. They told stories of moonshining in the 70s, stories involving revenue agents and narrow escapes and more than one dog named Blue.

When I left, they slapped my back like a nephew going off to war.

“Atlanta’s that way,” one said, pointing down the road. “Get yourself a ball game. Braves are home this week.”

I hadn’t planned on it. But maybe the road had.

I reached Atlanta the next afternoon. The skyline rose like a jagged promise. I parked near the stadium and bought a last-minute ticket from a guy holding a cardboard sign. It was overpriced. I didn’t care.

Inside, the crowd buzzed with energy. The Braves were playing the Phillies, and the stadium lights made everything look sharper than real life. I found my seat between a father and his teenage son on one side and an elderly woman with a scorecard on the other.

As the game started, I felt something settle in me. Maybe it was the rhythm of the game, the crack of the bat, the rise and fall of the crowd’s voices. Maybe it was the way the sunset painted the sky above the stadium in bands of orange and pink. Or maybe it was simply the feeling of having come from somewhere and gone somewhere else, collecting pieces of strangers along the way.

The father next to me cheered so loud he startled the kid. The elderly woman muttered about missed calls like she could curse an umpire into reason. The team hit a home run in the sixth inning, and the stadium roared. I roared with it.

For the first time in months—maybe years—I felt part of something bigger than myself, something moving, alive, full of possibility.

When the game ended and the crowd flowed out into the humid Georgia night, I walked slowly to my car. I didn’t know where I was headed next. I didn’t need to.

The road had been right so far. That was enough.

I dug into my pocket and found the peppermint the Mojo Lady had given me at the Waffle House. I unwrapped it, popped it into my mouth, and let it dissolve as I drove into the night, windows down, the city lights fading behind me.

Wherever I was going, the road would know before I did.

And I trusted it now.

Graduations, Reunions, and Life Choices

Got my lease renewed for this year.  So I don’t have that hanging anymore.  Also got a few new shirts in the mail from my dad this morning.  Thanks Dad.  I appreciate it.  Ever since I went more minimalist than most people a few years ago I have less of everything, including clothing.  This means I wear what I do have more often and have to do laundry often.  Maybe I should pick up some more clothing just so I don’t have to do washing and replacing clothing more often.  Unfortunately clothing wears out if you wash it a lot and wear it quite often.  I found this out through my own experiences.

Been going outside more often lately even with it being a damper and colder than usual spring.  I still don’t drive much except when necessary.  I fire up my car at least every few days just to make sure everything is in proper order.  Even though I no longer take road trips like I did even a few years ago, it is good to know I could if I had to.

I might be making a couple trips this summer.  I have a family reunion in Colorado at the end of June I might be going to.  And my twenty year class reunion is the first weekend in July.  I’m still undecided if I’m going.  Sadly, many of the people I spent the bulk of my time with in high school live far away and probably aren’t the types to go to reunions anyway.  Some days it’s hard to believe I’ve been out of high school for twenty years.  Other days, especially when I’m in the grips of mental illness, it feels like someone else’s life.  An incredible amount has changed since I graduated high school in 1999.

I occasionally break out my high school annuals and photographs of high school and college friends.  I remember when we graduated high school, one of the speakers said something to the effect that we wouldn’t truly appreciate the power and beauty of youth until we were older.  So true.  I guess the biggest thing I miss about high school and college is how easy it was to socialize and make friends in those environments.  I was a geeky kid I admit.  I would have been the stereotypical nerd in high school and college except that I had a lot of physical strength (but no coordination).  I was on the football and track teams in high school and did intramural softball in college.  I probably couldn’t have done any other sports as a kid.  I wasn’t fast enough for soccer or coordinated enough for baseball or basketball or quick enough for wrestling.

Another thing about school and college I miss is the academics.  Even though I never got straight A’s in any level of school, I still did pretty decent in classes.  I did well enough grade wise and test wise to qualify for some really good scholarships.  I am so, so glad I graduated college debt free.  I couldn’t manage on a disability pension while paying off loans.  It was tough giving up on the MBA program once I lost my graduate assistant job.  But I wasn’t going to continue on in school if I had no way to pay for it outright.  Debt scared me then and it still scares me even though I haven’t had debts for years.  I don’t know if I even have a credit score anymore simply because I don’t borrow money.

My eldest nephew recently graduated middle school.  He will be starting high school at a large suburban public school this autumn.  So he may be going to college in four years.  I don’t really have any advice for the youngsters except remain flexible and open to new experiences.  We have no idea what jobs will be around in even ten years.  Many jobs could be eliminated due to automation and artificial intelligence.  Of course, many new jobs could be coming too.  I can’t in good faith advise any kid on what career path to take.

I won’t even tell them to ‘follow your heart.’  I saw too many people take that advice and end up with degrees that have few job prospects, at least right now. Yet, I remember an interview Mark Cuban gave on a business news show a couple years ago and he said to the effect that if machines keep taking over jobs, then people with humanities and liberal arts degrees might be in demand more than even business and technical fields within ten years.  Wouldn’t that be ironic; for years kids were discouraged from being arts and humanities students for fear they’d be able to do nothing but make coffee and work fast food.  Soon we may say the same thing about accounting, business, and delivery drivers.

In short, we don’t know what will be available.  In fact, the youngsters coming through the ranks may have to retrain every few years for new job skills.  The tech and science isn’t going to slow down anytime soon.  It is actually getting faster.  We could be going into a really cool future but it could be a rugged journey to get there.  The next generation or two could be quite rough as we navigate the biggest change to civilization since Industrialization got going in the lat 1700s and early 1800s.  I hope we are up to the challenges.

I Want To Shake Things Up and Get More Active Again

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My back has healed up.  I’m back to essentially a more normal routine.  Because of the colder weather and being housebound for two weeks, I got to do some thinking about changing things in my life.  I have essentially been in a rut for the last couple years where it’s pretty much the same old every day, day in and day out.  I haven’t done any real traveling for almost three years, spending much of my time self educating via youtube and Khan Academy and reading books.  I gained back the weight I lost within two years of my car accident back in 2015.  Now I’m getting more serious about my health again.  I don’t eat fast food anymore.  I’m starting to get out of my apartment more and walk a little every day.  I do arm weights three times a week.  And about the only things I drink anymore are water and coffee.  I feel like I’m beginning to see some results.  I started this new routine shortly after New Year’s.  Because my back slowed me down for two weeks, I just cut back on what I ate.  I’m to where I now eat meat only once a day, usually for breakfast.  The rest of the meals I eat things like spinach leaf salads, soups, peanut butter, and meatless pasta.  I think my routines are starting to work.  I feel like I have more energy.  I feel more mobile.  I’m starting to have fewer aches and pains.  And I am sleeping better too.

I’m also thinking that after I have lost some weight, I’m going to have to get out and about more.  I am in desperate need of shaking up my routines and adding more spice to my life.  A few years ago I said that I would like to do some traveling eventually.  I still have my savings that I built up a few years ago.  I’m thinking I’m going to have to see my old college friends again.  I don’t have a definite time line set just yet as this is still in the dreaming before making plans phase.  I have always wanted to get my passport and travel through Europe and see places like Barcelona, Paris, Berlin, London, etc.  Part of me would, if I get back to the same weight I was in college, love to travel on some of the old Silk Road from eastern Europe to China or vice versa.  When I was in high school I spent a couple weeks in Mexico with my Spanish class.  It was the most enjoyable vacation I had in my entire life.  Now that I am an adult, debt free, committed to getting back into good physical health, and have a little bit of a savings, I’m going to have to do this traveling before I get too old to enjoy it.  Since I am single, have a safety net in my disability pension, and I can do my blog from anywhere that has WiFi internet, I’m starting to hear the faint beckoning call of the open road again.

When I was in my twenties and early thirties, I did a little traveling every year.  My senior year of college, my parents and I went to San Antonio for Christmas.  I got to see The Riverwalk lit up for Christmas, visited the Alamo, got to see one of the Air Force bases my dad was stationed at during the Vietnam War, and got to see my Nebraska Huskers play a post season bowl game.  And an old college friend and I used to go to Denver to see Colorado Rockies baseball games, one of those games being a World Series game.  Spent all winter paying off the cost of that quick weekend trip, and even though the Rockies lost the Series, it was worth the trip.  I visited an old college friend in Minnesota for a week several summers ago.  I was amazed at how beautiful Minnesota is (I wouldn’t care to fight their winters). My friends and I used to go to minor league baseball games every summer.  We were able to get front row seats, a couple hot dogs, and a couple soda pops for less than $25 a person.  Just thinking about these old times while I was house bound for the last two weeks got me to realize just how much I missed travel and seeing different places.

I know that before I can fulfill these dreams of traveling, I have to lose some weight.  I have done it before.  And by God I can do it again.  I know it’s going to take at least a few years before I can get to doing the travel overseas like I dream of doing.  But I have pretty much gotten to where I have played all the computer games and done most of the self study I care to do.  I took a couple years doing that and I have gotten it out of my system.  Now it is time for a different chapter in my life.  It’s time to lose some weight and prepare to hit the road again.

Road Trip

Went on a road trip to see my parents at their place over the weekend.  It was the first time in months I had been outside of my hometown.  It was good to have a change of pace and get away for a couple days.  My parents are clearing out some of their old clutter as they are preparing to move.  It’s looking more like we’re going to move to be near my brother’s family all the time.  Mom and Dad are looking at different places online almost everyday.  So it looks like if they get their house and the acreage sold, then we’ll be moving probably in late summer.

Mentally I’m looking forward to possibly be living in a larger area.  I have lived in small towns my entire life.  But I have always wanted to live in or near a major city at least once in my life.  Now it looks like it might happen.  I definitely feel like I’m missing out on my brother’s family as I see his kids only a few times a year.  And I regret that my brother and I aren’t close.  We weren’t close as kids and unfortunately that carried over into adulthood.  I don’t dislike him or anything like that, it’s just that we don’t have much in common.  I guess we never have.

In other news, things have been kind of quiet for the last several days.  I may be sleeping less than I did during the winter, but that is fine by me.  Mentally I’m feeling quite stable.  Haven’t been having problems with hallucinations or delusional thoughts for weeks.  I also don’t have problems with depression or anxiety.  Things have become quite stable.

So Long Winter

Winter is all but over now.  The weather has been warming up and the days have gotten longer.  It will be staying light longer since time change is this weekend in my country.  As a result I’ve been feeling better mentally and been more physically active.  I had forgotten what is was to be able to go outside all the time and not worry about the cold and snow.  These last couple months have been the longest stretch of mental stability I have had in months.  Between the increased physical activity, the better mental health, and the better weather, these last two weeks have gone remarkably well.

Made a couple road trips in the last two weeks.  Went to the family acreage for the day yesterday.  Got to relax, catch some sunshine, see some wildlife, and spend time with the family.  I rarely go to my hometown anymore except for holidays and family gatherings.  There just isn’t much holding me there anymore.  I can get and do pretty much anything I need and want in my current town.  I have a few more road trips planned for the spring.

The stabilized mental health has made it much easier to enjoy this spring.  Didn’t enjoy last fall as much as I normally enjoy fall because a few flare ups of the mental illness.  But that seems to be in the past now.  Been an enjoyable last two weeks and I’m anxiously looking forward to the rest of spring.

 

Plans For Spring

 

Looking at my calendar I see that there’s less than one month until the start of Spring.  Looking out my window, I see that almost all the snow we had three weeks ago is gone and the trees are showing buds.  I also heard several flocks of Canadian Geese overhead during the last few days.  We’ve had nicer than usual weather the last several days, giving us a teaser for the spring.  Even preseason baseball practice has started.  I’m thinking it’s going to be another long year for my Colorado Rockies but since the Kansas City Royals put together some excellent teams the last couple years, it has me thinking it’s possible.  But hope springs with all the possibilities of the upcoming Spring.

Now that I’ve stabilized after the problems of the fall and the holiday season, I think that getting out of the apartment complex more is in order.  There is a cool museum in one of the nearby towns that I haven’t been to for a few years.  It’s called Pioneer Village.  Pretty cool place with a lot of antique cars, toys, nick nacks, and a full scale 1880s frontier town in the complex.  I think almost every school kid in Nebraska has made a field trip to this place.  Pioneer Village is definitely a must for any visitor to Nebraska.

Another must is the bird migrations that go on in late February and March.  Every spring thousands of Canadian Geese, Sandhills Cranes, and other migrating birds come.  The fields along the Platte River, particularly along Interstate 80, are so covered with birds the fields are white with them.  They are especially thick the first two weeks of March.  Some places along the Platte River offer guided tours that draw bird watchers from all over the country.  I probably won’t be paying for any tours. I’ll just go a few miles outside of town and check out any field near the river.  Last year I was lucky enough to see several large flocks of geese take off.  Mornings are usually best for viewing the migrating birds, but evenings are pretty good too.

I’m also planning on being at the family acreage this spring.  I haven’t been there since late October.  From what I heard the place wintered well.  A mother cat had several kittens they made it through the winter.  Dad is talking about building solar panels for the cabin.  Since I’ve helped him build a couple cabins and renovate his rental house over the last several years, I’ll help him on this project.  I got pretty decent at using power tools, saws, and wood working.  But I never got very good with electrical work.  This may be a chance to pick that skill up.

I’m going to exercise outdoors as the weather warms.  I’ve been limited to walking indoors and arm weights three times a week since late November. Haven’t gained any weight in the last month, so I’ve stopped the weight gain.  Now the weather is going to warm soon I’ll start losing again.  I should have known that losing weight last winter wasn’t normal unless you have good exercise equipment at home.  Yesterday was the first time I exercised outdoors for any real length in a month.  That large blizzard we had at the beginning of the month is mostly melted.  I’m looking forward to the start of spring.  I won’t be sorry when the winter ends.

 

 

My Buddy’s Wedding

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My college buddy Matt got married over the last weekend.  It was an outdoors wedding but wasn’t terribly hot as July in South Dakota can be.  While I was standing up with Matt I had to keep reminding myself not to lock up my knees so I wouldn’t pass out.  Matt was really nervous the morning of the wedding.  But I made it a point to not ask him if he was.  I must have heard at least ten people ask him about nervousness.  The wedding and reception went off well and there weren’t any true mess ups.  I posted a pic of myself in a suit even if I do look like Tony Soprano.

Mentally I held up better than expected.  Summers have always been a tough time for me so I was concerned going in.  But I just allowed myself to enjoy the few days away from the grind.  Got to catch up with old friends and made a few new ones.  Played multiple games of Jeopardy (I won a couple of those) and had a poker tournament the night before the wedding.  I lasted a couple hours before losing my $20 buy in but good luck getting out of a night club or concert with spending that little.  I think a night at the movies costs almost that much for one person.  Matt ended up making the most money of anyone in our eight person game.  Have fun with our money on the honeymoon Matt 🙂

It was a great few days out of my routine.  The weather was perfect for early July, the Black Hills were as green and beautiful as I’ve seen in years, and we had some great times.