Spending a quiet, calm, and uneventful weekend at my apartment. Haven’t talked to anyone this weekend. After several days of forcing myself out of my comfort zones trying to be more social and out going, I am needing a quiet weekend to recharge and regroup. Deciding that I’m spending the weekend binging on computer games and youtube music videos. Been listening to some of the music I listened to in high school and college the last few days. I refuse to go as far as to say music was better twenty years ago because anyone will be nostalgic for what they grew up listening to in the formative years of their teens and early twenties. I imagine in early 1800s Germany there were people complaining about Beethoven. And I’m sure when the 2030s roll around my nephews’ generation will complain about what their kids listen to, watch and read.
As it is, it’s been a calming and relaxing weekend. It was overcast, kind of chilly, and raining on and off all day yesterday. We get those days quite a bit in early spring. I enjoy those type of days. Boil some coffee, find a good book, and just enjoy the day. I also do some of my better writing on days like that. Days like that are one of the reasons spring is my favorite time of year.
Looks like I made it through another winter without having any major setbacks. I did have to readjust my life some as I got to where I didn’t like being around people and preferred to sleep as much as possible. Maybe one of the reasons I stayed stable was I avoided people as much as possible. But with winter ending I suppose I no longer have the excuse of it being too cold or too much snow to leave my complex. I have to renew my lease in a few weeks. So I have to get my paper work together for that. Too bad I couldn’t do this online and submitting e-files. My rent is literally the only thing I even write checks for anymore. I imagine this dream of mine is still a few years away.
Haven’t been up to much lately. Still sleeping mostly during the days and spending most of my nights wide awake. So far it seems to be working. I’ll have to make a point to be up earlier as the exterminator is coming to spray apartments tomorrow morning. So I have been spending much of this evening cleaning up my place. Even though I have been stable mental health wise, I did allow some clutter like dirty clothes and books pile up around the house. Still have a little more to do. But I’ll be up much of the night and it’s things I can do without waking the neighbors.
Haven’t been reading as much as I would like to lately. Maybe the mind needs some time to absorb and process all the new information I’ve been taking in the last several months. I haven’t even read that many online articles the last few weeks. But I have always done my best reading in the winters.
I can tell the days are starting to get shorter and cooler. And I enjoy it. Won’t be too long until winter is here. From Christmas until it gets really hot in early July have always been my favorite times of year. Spring is usually my favorite season. I even like winter, especially since it’s more socially acceptable to spend a lot of time at home and sleep more during the cold weather. If I ever leave Nebraska, one thing I will miss is the distinct changes in the seasons.
Haven’t watched that much for TV this week. I still try to avoid cable news channels as they usually report only bad news and nothing on what’s going well. But good news doesn’t sell like bad news and mass media certainly isn’t a public service. I guess what news and TV I do get is mostly internet based anymore. Like many people I’d feel naked without good internet connections. Maybe avoiding bad news and rude people are making me more stable than usual. Sure it kills my social life, but if a person is going to be in a foul mood most of the time then I’m going to avoid that person as much as possible. I’ve quit jobs in the past because of coworkers and bosses always being negative and angry. I mean, we’re stuck doing a job together, make the most of it already.
Haven’t heard much from friends either. But I have been largely avoiding Facebook for over two weeks now. And I feel quite a bit more calm and relaxed because of it. It just makes me sad and irritated both to see my friends and family in foul moods in things they really can’t do anything about. Yes, it is possible to feel sad for someone and irritated with them at the same time.
It’s just been really quiet on my end for the last several weeks. The insect spray man coming tomorrow is essentially the highlight of my day tomorrow and he’ll be here for only a minute or two. But I should get the rest of my cleaning finished. So long.
Hi there, thank you for checking out my blog page where I write about Bipolar, adhd,bpd and ptsd which I struggle with daily. This blog is to both educate and give others hope. I also write about my drug addiction in hopes of giving other people encouragment and hope for a brighter, annd better future.Thank you. sincerly, Emily Thorn.