Hosting Christmas With A Mental Illness

I twisted my knee a few days before Christmas bad enough I could barely walk.  Fortunately after a few days of rest and ibuprofen I’m as good as new.  Since I couldn’t navigate stairs over Christmas, my parents came to my apartment on Christmas.  They brought Christmas dinner and a few gifts.  I hosted them for a few hours and they then went to Oklahoma to visit my brother’s family for a few days.  I was glad they left some left over turkey and pie.  Those were my meals the day after Christmas.

I didn’t get much for Christmas.  But I might be getting a FitBit in a few days once the crowds settle into the winter doldrums.  After my car accident I got lazy about exercising and dieting.  As a result I gained back most of the weight I lost in the previous two years.  I’m starting over.  I hope the FitBit can help in this regard.  I found out my general practice doctor retired recently.  So I’m in the market for a different doctor.  My psych doctor and therapist are also older men who are starting to think retirement too.  I’ve had my current psych doctor for over ten years and my current therapist for two years.  One of the problems of having a chronic illness like schizophrenia is that the illness outlasts even the best doctors because schizophrenia doesn’t retire.  Sure in my case the problems have gotten less severe over the years.  I don’t know if it’s because I’ve mellowed as the years have passed or I’m just getting better at managing the illness.  Either way I’m glad I have a routine that more or less works and has kept me out of the mental hospital for three years.

Another holiday season has come and passed.  I did pretty well mentally but I think that’s because I avoided crowds and shopping malls.  I’ve learned what I can and cannot handle over the years through trial and error.  It was a successful holiday season as far as I’m concerned even though I didn’t get to see my extended family.  It actually felt pretty good hosting a small gathering over Christmas this year.  I might have to do this more often if I can limit the size of the gathering.

Dealing With Physical Pain And Mental Illness

I’ve now been fighting severe lower back pain for a week.  I went to the chiropractor on the first to get my back worked on.  I get to go back in on Thursday for more work.  I hope I don’t have to have many more appointments.  Medicaid will cover only so many chiropractic appointments per year.  I’m working with the same place that rehabbed me after my car accident last fall.

Since I can barely walk now I’m moving from trying to lose weight to just maintaining.  As bad as my back hurts I won’t do any exercise for awhile.  I’m thinking this could be a very long process.  At first I thought two or three days of ice and ibuprofen would be all I needed.  The back isn’t healing as quickly as I hoped.

Naturally this has me slightly depressed and mildly irritated.  I was anticipating being outdoors and walking in the park everyday, just like the previous two summers.  Summers were when I lost most of my weight.  I also decided that I won’t be able to sleep in my bed anymore, at least not until my back completely heals.  I have a recliner I can sleep in.  It is so much easier to get up from sitting down than lying down.  When I was in the chiropractor’s office on Wednesday morning, the chiropractor and I had a tough time getting me off the work table after I laid down on my back.  I felt bad for the poor lady.  But I suppose she’s seen far worse than what I had.

The back pain is more bearable now that I’m not having the auditory hallucinations.  Haven’t had to deal with those for a few weeks.  I’m still not very comfortable with driving as I do tend to be more irritable in traffic than I should.  Fortunately I haven’t crossed over into road rage.  If I can tell it’s not going to be a good mental health day I avoid driving unless it’s absolutely necessary.  But the lower back pain is going to slow down my leaving the apartment and running errands.  Too bad because I need to go grocery shopping in a few days.  The store I normally shop in is a really large store.  I love walking through the isles and seeing the huge variety, especially in the overnight hours.  Since the back is hurting bad, I won’t be able to enjoy that for awhile.  I would hate to think I have to use an electric cart for my shopping.  I mean I’m not that old even if I have a birthday in two weeks.

As I’ve been out of commission for a few days I’ve been spending most of my time at home.  I usually play computer games, watch youtube videos, and check in on friends through Facebook.  I’m starting to get a little restless as I’ve been doing this for several days.  But it’s a restlessness I can do nothing about as my physical health is suffering.  I think this isn’t going to be an easy recovery.  It’s a shame I have to start falling apart physically just about the time I’m getting my mental health in order.


Setbacks in Weight Loss

I haven’t posted for awhile so an update is in order.  I have been struggling with the diet and exercise routine for the last two months.  I gained around 15 pounds since the middle of May.  I admit I haven’t been as compulsive about tracking what I eat since at least early May.  I’ve been exercising at least 4 to 5 days a week, but it’s apparently not enough exercise to keep the weight loss going.  I work on losing weight as I have a family history of heart and high blood pressure problems.  I refuse to be one of those who dies in their 40s of something they could have prevented.  Overall, I’m still down 55 pounds.  But this summer has been much tougher than the last.  Heck, I was even having much better success losing weight in the winter than I am now.

I want to get back into tracking what I eat again.  That was really working. I became haphazard about it. I even quit tracking for most of this month.  I must be consuming far more than I thought.  In spring 2014, it took only one day of tracking before I figured out I was eating way too much to hope to lose weight.  I’m getting back on that again.

The exercising was going good since I got back from the Black Hills until I pulled a muscle in my lower back this morning.  Looks like heat packs, ibuprofen, and not exercising for the next day or two.  But if I was taking in more than I was burning off, then the exercise was essentially being nullified.  So the day or two away from the exercise will allow me to get reacquainted with tracking my food consumption.