Even though I don’t go out or socialize in person much anymore, I still keep busy. I was recently demonetized on Medium. No explanation and no way to appeal. Really irritated me as I was making some decent money.

In some ways, they did me a favor forcing me back into Word Press on a regular basis. Even though I haven’t been posting much over the past year or so, I was still getting a decent amount of audience. Some days I would check, and I would have 40 or so views on a single day even though I hadn’t posted in weeks. Maybe the word is getting out there.

Sure, I made more money on Medium. But I got better audiences on Word Press. But I guess nothing lasts forever. There were also a lot of complainers and whiners on Medium. I don’t miss them. First World problems in most cases. I swear people like that never had to deal with bullies and setbacks as kids.

I was bullied a lot as a kid. Ended up in several fights, most of which I lost. But I’m glad I went through it. Made me confident in my ability to survive and adapt, especially as I got older. No I didn’t enjoy it at the time. But I thank God every day I dealt with some hardship as a kid during prosperous times.

I was born in 1980 and spent most of my formative years in the 1990s. We still had the latch key kind of things. I had my freedom, like most small-town kids. And the grownups usually let the kids solve their own problems unless we got too destructive or violent. Much of that behavior would be considered child abuse these days.

Personally, I think real abuse is sheltering kids from the consequences of their actions, not teaching them how to cook or do basic repairs to household items or never letting them solve their own problems. Hitting your kids isn’t the only form of child abuse out there. I think not preparing them for adulthood and its ups and downs is every bit as abusive as punching them in the face.

In some ways I’m glad I didn’t have kids or get married. But that is mostly because of the schizophrenia. While I don’t particularly enjoy living with my elderly parents, I know I would enjoy living in a nursing home (been there, done that) or being homeless would be even worse. It’s a blow to my pride that I live with my parents after being on my own for seventeen years. But I try not to complain, at least publicly, because I know it could a lot worse.

I’ve always taken mental health seriously. Even more so now with everything changing so rapidly. I’m under no delusion that I’ll ever make enough money to support myself off writing. Vast majority of even paid writers don’t make above poverty level wages off writing alone.

I’m kind of burned out on computer games. And almost every time I try to socialize with anyone outside of immediate family, these people are in awful moods all the time. Nothing can make most people happy.

These people are going to be really unhappy in a few years when AI and automation take more and more jobs, especially since we have almost nothing for social safety nets. Rest assured; it will happen. A lot of people will eventually lose their jobs to AI and automation. I’ve been trying to tell people this for over a dozen years. About the only people who listened are my retired elderly parents and my best friend. She’s always grumpy and grouchy now, it’ll only get worse when she loses her good paying job she’s complains about almost daily.

I know it sounds like I don’t sympathize with these people whose jobs are on the robot chopping block. But you would be wrong. I lost my career and everything I worked for many years ago due to my mental illness. I did everything right; worked hard in school, stayed away from drugs, stayed away from credit cards, stayed out of trouble, etc. And I still lost everything.

Millions of people will find themselves in the same boat within several years. Not their fault a machine can probably do their jobs better than they ever could. Soon they will be cheaper too. In my case I lost my career in my twenties rather than my forties when I would have had a mortgage, a couple kids to send to college, and a retirement to save for.

In spite being surrounded by grouches, I’m looking forward to Christmas. I didn’t ask for any special gifts. I think a large dinner of spiral ham, stuffing, green bean casserole, etc. is enough of a gift. Don’t know how many Christmases I have left, but I intend to really enjoy this one. It’s just too bad that it doesn’t snow much down here in Oklahoma City.