It’s been almost a week since my psych breakdown. I’ve pretty much put the pieces back together. I’m going to bed earlier and have given up all caffeine for the last few days. I do sleep a lot again and I do occasionally get minor headaches. I hope the headaches are more from stress than caffeine withdrawal.
I do get out of my apartment a little everyday. I bought groceries and gas over the weekend. Had been putting that off for too long. Since the weather has turned cool I have been eating a lot of higher carb things like spaghetti and rice. I always did better in colder weather than the heat of the summer. I always did enjoy hunkering under a blanket and reading for hours on end.
I’m still reading many science and tech sites. Some days I have to remind myself that things like this are being attempted in the here and now all over the world and that it’s not a sci fi tv series. I saw things like driverless cars, urban farming, and portable computers only in comic books as a kid in the 1980s. Even our natural disasters, we are able to predict major storms days in advanced and organize rescue and humanitarian aid within hours. As bad as these recent hurricanes, forest fires, and earthquakes have been, in past eras they could have been much worse. I don’t know if I’m being overly optimistic, but I have spent much of my early years being a pessimist. I gave pessimism up once I figured out that most of what I worried about was more manageable then I previously thought. Anxiety is often worse than the actual problem itself.
Overall I’m feeling pretty decent considering how rough last week turned out. Even though I leave my apartment everyday, I don’t socialize much in person. I try to avoid social media as I have found some of my friends and family I enjoy talking to are now avoiding it too. I have enough going on in my schizophrenia stressed mind to deal with anyone else’s problems. I have to take care of myself before I can help out anyone.