Discouragement

I spent several days at my parents’ place last week.  I was needing the peace and quiet and a little encouragement.  Unfortunately the encouragement left as soon as I got home. I have been convinced for years that the environment a person lives in and the type of people they are forced to associate with on a day to day business can greatly effect a person’s happiness and overall well being.  Most people have thought I was full of it for believing this as the majority of people I know believe you can will yourself out of depression, mental illness, and a bad situation.  You can’t will yourself out of mental illness anymore than an amputee can will his leg back.  In this day and age of advanced medicine and science, the people that think such things think them mainly because they choose to remain ignorant about science, technology, and illness.

I don’t get encouragement from being around my neighbors.  Haven’t for a long time.  I certainly don’t find encouragement when I try to contact even close friends and family online anymore.  Even family and close friends too often act like barbarians online, and don’t even get me started on random strangers and friends of friends.  About the only real intelligent and rational conversation and interactions I have anymore on my tech enthusiasts groups and my parents.  And my parents are both advanced in age and not in great health, so they will probably be dying within twenty years.  When they go, I’ll lose the vast majority of my social outlets and supports.  Tell me again why I want to live to old age?

I’m not sorry for being discouraged and sounding off about it.  Why should I?  Everybody else feels free to gripe and complain and generally drag anyone within ear shot into the cesspool that is socializing.  Even Superman has his kryptonite.  And lately I have been exposed to near lethal doses of it.  I’m tired from fighting and not seeing any results.  I’m tired of trying to encourage people with good news that doesn’t make the press only to be told I am a liar and that I’m a peddler of fake news.  I’m tired of always having to keep my head down in the dirt when we as a species were meant to reach for the stars.  Normal people are discouraging, you really are.

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7 thoughts on “Discouragement

  1. Definitely experienced this as well. I have my good months and bad, a lot of it stemming from that difficulty in finding folks who will listen and converse constructively. Like yourself my artistic side has taken a bit of a backseat to focusing on mental health. I greatly appreciate your openness in discussing your journey, keep it up.

  2. I find most people can’t confront their own problems and therefore fear those of us who can, their scared we might have tumbled their game so they put up barriers and belittle anything that might threaten their “perfect”, “genuine” existence.

    Don’t let them get to you, most humans are superficial assholes anyway.

    1. Perhaps, but a multitude of superficial sins can be negated by a thoughtful humanitarian or a new science field that is devoted more to helping people than just chasing fame and fortune. I write about confronting my problems with mental illness problems mainly because there are many with mental illness who aren’t able to talk about it.

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