It’s now been two weeks since I started the process of medication changes. I will go off one med entirely starting tomorrow. I’ve already noticed positive changes in my moods and mental states. I don’t get as easily irritated and I seem to deal slightly better with stressors. I have a stronger want to get out of my apartment and do things other than blog and mess with computers. I even found myself looking through the job postings of my local newspaper just to see what was out there. While I don’t believe I’m stable enough to hold employment, I have found myself kind of bored with the life I had carved out for myself over the last two to three years.
I find myself wanting to socialize now outside of close friends and family members now. To this end I talk more to tenants in my complex and participate more in online discussion forms. I didn’t realize until the last few days just how bad I had let my socializing fall apart over the last year or so. I actually feel bad now that I haven’t been socializing. Yes I have gone from being irritated and annoyed by most people to now actually wanting to be around people more often. I doubt I’ll ever become Mr. Social Hour as I have been an introvert my entire life. But I do enjoy people watching at the park and the mall.
I haven’t been as active as I would have liked. But I hope that’s mainly because of chillier weather the last several days. I don’t think I eat any more than I did previously with exception to the first few days of the change over. I don’t crave sugar all the time now. Hopefully that was a passing thing as I was adapting to different medications. But I haven’t had much for auditory hallucinations nor have I had much for paranoia the last few days. I’m not even that bothered by driving any more, at least not as much. I don’t get overly irritated if someone is driving too slow or not following standard road etiquette.
And there are some things that haven’t changed that much. I still don’t watch that much traditional tv, especially not the news. The news I usually get from online sources. In fact, most of my tv watching besides live sports is online. I will watch some baseball most days or at least have it on in the background while I’m doing something else. And I’m involved in the same fantasy baseball league I’ve been with for the last several years. It’s a free online league of myself, a few college friends, and several friends of friends. But just because it’s a free league doesn’t mean it’s not competitive. It makes me watch games almost everyday and pay attention at least ten minutes a day to my team.
I see my psych doctor tomorrow to discuss the next phase of my treatments. We could be going anywhere from here. But I know we won’t keep doing what we have been for the last several months. I can hardly wait to see where we go from here.