I’ll be turning 43 next week. That more than makes me middle aged. And it feels weird, but not bad weird in many ways. My mental illness is far more manageable now than in my 20s and 30s. I’ve gotten more respect for my brains and thoughts since I turned 40 than I ever did the previous 40 years of my life. I’m no longer governed by my hormones. One less thing to worry about I guess. Finally feel like I’m getting something done now that I’m no longer want to chase women. I also have a lot more confidence in my own abilities, especially as a writer and thinker.

I’m starting to see people my age complain about the ‘lousy kids.’ It honestly amuses and annoys me at the same time. Maybe it’s because I don’t have kids of my own that I find it comically hypocritical and ironic. I find it odd that the parents who want to ban library books and complain about 2020s culture and music, these are the same people who grew up in broken homes on self made microwaved meals, R.L. Stine books, the X-Files, South Park, Kevin Smith movies, dystopic science fiction like Terminator and The Matrix, Chuck Palahniuk novels, softcore porn on cable most nights, massive amounts of drugs, insane quantities of premarital sex, and the music of NWA, 2 Live Crew, Madonna, and Marilyn Manson back in the 90s. We turned out alright, apparently, since the Latch Key kids of the 80s and 90s now dominate almost everything but politics. We didn’t leave high school at 18 and magically wake up as 40-year-olds the next day. I can see why the teenagers lump my age bracket in with the ‘ok boomer’ trope. I may be a jaded middle-aged Gen Xer, but I’ll be cursed before I start taking my frustrations out on young people.